Your journey to parenthood may not be as easy as it is for some other families you know. You may be coming to us from a place of loss — perhaps having experienced a miscarriage, or the loss of the dream of easily having a family. You may also be a gay or lesbian couple with your own fertility challenges. The on-site infertility counselors at CT Fertility are here to help you explore your options, answer all of your questions and stand by you with encouragement, empathy, and support on your path to fertility.
Navigating the Emotions that Arise
Many emotions may emerge as you proceed through your treatments at our Connecticut or New York fertility clinic — anxiety, loneliness, jealousy, shame and frustration. Relationships may be strained and communication problems may arise. We can help you find the coping skills that make this journey easier and are here to offer you strategies, techniques, resources, and compassion.
Communicating with your Partner
Struggling with infertility can be a difficult time for a couple. Even a very good marriage will be stressed, and loving partners will find they are facing unexpected challenges. Couples often notice an emotional time difference, where one will experience and process emotions months before the other. Additionally, women, on whom the major burden for treatment falls, cannot easily escape from the pressure of infertility, even at work. Women are very aware of drug effects, appointments they have to keep, and where they are in their cycles. Their partners, on the other hand, can escape more easily from the pressure, by going to work and focusing on other things. It is vital to keep the lines of communication open. This is something that our Connecticut fertility specialists can coach you through.
For gay couples, fertility treatments can also cause strain on the relationship as you pursue parenthood through gay surrogacy or lesbian IVF treatments. Gay or straight, communication with your partner is key during this emotional time.
Managing Family and Friends
Sometimes, your family and friends say just the right thing and are a source of comfort to you as you struggle with infertility, but more often than not they don’t and they aren’t. The truth is, even people who love and care about you say and do hurtful things. They do not know enough about your experience, especially the emotional part, and they may say things that come from their own worry or fear. A lack of understanding is behind comments such as, “you just need to relax,” “adopt and you’ll get pregnant,” and “you should be grateful you don’t have something life-threatening.” Unfortunately, it is very common for infertile people to be subjected to tactless remarks and infuriating questions.
You may also find yourself in what seems to be a localized baby boom, with relatives and friends pregnant and giving birth all around you. Invitations to baby showers, christenings, namings, and brises tie you in an anxious knot. Even the holidays are a challenge. Christmas and Passover, for example, can be very child-oriented and hard to endure, let alone enjoy, for the couple longing to be parents.
The experts at CT Fertility can help you with strategies for getting through these times, and simply listen to you as you express your point of view in a safe place.
Helping You Make Informed Decisions
Some of the decisions you may have to make may be confusing or stressful. Our Connecticut & NYC fertility doctors can help you learn more about your options, lay everything out on the table and talk through all the possible choices so that you feel assured that you are doing what’s best for your unique situation.
Third-Party Reproduction — a Collaborative Endeavor
We have extensive experience helping patients manage third-party reproduction including gay & lesbian surrogacy. From surrogate selection to mediating the relationship with a donor, we are at your side as your ally and advocate throughout this process.
The stress, strain, and difficult feelings connected to infertility treatment are universal and not to be taken lightly. We are committed to the well-being of your entire person, both mind and body. We are here for you to help you as a parent-to-be, whether you are a woman, a man, or a couple, and ask simply that you come as you are and allow us to assist you.